About Me

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 I am a former Marine Combat Engineer. I got out of the corps in November of 20011. I am now living in San Diego, California working as a model and actor. I am seemingly the only country guy in the area but still love the place. I am taking my life one step at a time towards a bigger better me. I will be starting college this fall. I will be studying culinary arts during my time there and hope to get a degree in business later on. I am generally a laid back guy. I have had my share of relationships and have been engaged twice. I am currently single if that says anything. I am not looking for long term so that I can focus on my life and where I am going.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

The Chance for Love and the Hurt that Follows...

For those of you that are keeping up with my story, you already know  that i have had my share of break-ups. I vowed never to date again to avoid the inevitable hurt. Well it has been almost a year now since I have legitimately dated, and I may break that vow now. I am undecided and am scared to death. I have known this guy for over two years now and will be moving across the country for college and a job but also to be closer to him. The thing that scares me most is that I actually want to date him. I have developed some very strong emotions towards him, and that scares the shit out of me.
 So here is my question to all my readers: Is Love worth the hurt? I understand that there will be hurt if I give this a chance. I also understand that people are only human and cannot be perfect. But I don't want to fall in love only to get hurt again. Some may say that I am living in fear. And I can agree with those of you who think so. I am only human. I am scared of hurt and pain. I am scared of that day when I am in tears because I wasn't good enough or the time just wasn't right. I am scared that I will put myself out there for a guy that might be and find out that he wasn't.
 Give it a chance? I am thinking about it. But I do not know if I am strong enough to take that next step. What advice can you give a guy that already knows both sides of the story? Follow my heart? That is for movies and fairy tales. Love can be a very happy place but I will always live in fear of the Hurt that Follows.

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