So this last weekend was great. After hours of boredom, Queen Bee(QB) and I decided to go to a local gay bar. When QB gets drunk, she transforms into a 5 year old with a grown woman's body and a mix of maturity. To put it simply, she is an awesome drunk. Very entertaining! At this particular bar, there are events for certain days of the week. That evening, there was a Wet Underwear Contest. A friend of mine that I had met on a iTouch app, Grindr, and QB decided that I should enter. After 5 seconds of peer pressure I finally gave in.
As a participant of said contest, one must strip to there underwear, get on stage and dance while getting sprayed with water. Usually there are three contestants, 1st prize is a hundred dollars cash. Sounds easy enough...'til that light is on you and your roommate is sticking out among the crowd half embarrassed to see her roommate/practically brother dance in his underwear. Regardless, I had fun doing it and won second place. One Free Drink For Me!!!! LOL.
As the night went on, QB proceeded to get PLASTERED! First the munchies hit her. Aware of her new hunger, she proceeded to convince/harass the cute security guard for a bite or two of his burrito. Next hit the bladder. She drags me along with her to the bathroom where she goes on and on about her undying love for me and to never let her nomadic tenancies get the best of her. I love her! After the bathroom, her eye caught the luscious ass of the host of the underwear contest. Spotting this marvel, she decides that she must give it a squeeze... A very surprised host laughed and complimented hers butt as we went out to the patio to smoke with Grindr Guy. In the midst of socializing and smoking, QB decided that a dinner party for the following day was in order. After inviting half of the crowd outside, another urge to pee hit her. This time however, the urge to hug random strangers got a hold of her. Poor people! some were shocked and surprised. Others knew us from previous visits to the bar. After much persuasion from myself and Grindr Guy, we left to get QB to bed. The car ride home was even more fun. The next stage of drunkeness that hit QB was half-consciousness. She tried writing "Bitches" on the inside of my windshield but got to the letter "B" and fell asleep. Half-way home, she goes, "My neck hurts, fix it, Bitches." So I turn her head the towards me instead and she falls over to where she is now laying half in the seat and half over the middle section of the car. She is like this for the remainder of the ride home. Getting her out of the car was a whole other story that I just don't want to get into but you can imagine the struggle. Anyways, I finally get her inside where she decides she hates dogs, can't remember who I am, and can't remember where she is. After a bit of pulling on her arm(literally), I got her in bed where she attempted to get comfortable and rolled off of the bed....twice. After a bit more struggle, I got her back in bed and called her friend "PNNU", to come over and take care of her. All in all a good night/morning. We both had some major recovery time later that day.
Moving on, we did have a dinner party which turned out to be quite the success. QB cooked her amazing meatloaf, green beans, home-fries, and bread sticks. For desert I baked my flavorful apple cobbler. If I were to describe that meal with one word it would be, "Mouth-gasm".
MOUTH-GASM: adjective: used to describe uncontrollable bursts of flavor orally; to describe the unknown phenomena caused by explosions of food within the mouth cavity; orgasmic pleasure in the mouth
Needless to say, everyone enjoyed the meal. After a cigarette break outside and a few good-byes to some of the guests, we departed for another night out for karaoke. No drunkenness that night but we did stay up very late. Stay tuned for the next random adventure!
- I am a former Marine Combat Engineer. I got out of the corps in November of 20011. I am now living in San Diego, California working as a model and actor. I am seemingly the only country guy in the area but still love the place. I am taking my life one step at a time towards a bigger better me. I will be starting college this fall. I will be studying culinary arts during my time there and hope to get a degree in business later on. I am generally a laid back guy. I have had my share of relationships and have been engaged twice. I am currently single if that says anything. I am not looking for long term so that I can focus on my life and where I am going.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Just to let ya'll know what my blog will contain....well to put simply, a lot of randomness in my adventure that I call life! I will be trying to blog at least once or twice a week.
I just moved into a cozy and spacious apartment that I absolutely love! My kitchen is perfect for the glorious meals that Queen Bee and I cook. BTW, our food is to die for! Seriously! Chewy has adjusted amazingly well and has plenty of room for his random stupidness. I don't think he has decided which room he enjoys relaxing in yet though. LOL.
I am actively searching for a steady job which is going incredibly slow. Gotta love today's economy! I am trying to get my name out there as a model. Kinda taking a lot longer than I had hoped though. I am also an aspiring gay porn-star. I just recently stopped playing the keyboard for a nearby church but might be playing again for another church. And yes, you did read that right! I donate plasma regularly. It is quite annoying though. I do love the movies they play though!
Anyways, that is about all you need to know about the who I am and what I do for now. Going on about today, Queen Bee and I decided to go to Walmart to grab a silver-ware seperater and some rubber mats for the shelves in the kitchen. I am not sure if it is just our opinion or if others feel the same way, but we believe that Walmart has devilishly placed everything in random places to get buyers to spend more money on things they may or may not need. We go in with two items on our minds. We come out with about twenty... Gotta love it.
Do you believe in Hungry Shopping? We do! Hungry shopping is similar to the above rant about Walmart. This happens when you go grocery shopping and then that evil monster, "Hunger", sneaks up on you and makes you buy all the yummy food you happen to pass by. Evil I say! Evil! The worst part is that it gets you when you least expect it! But the end rewards are always nice because when you get back home and you find out that that hunger you felt earlier is no longer there, you have all this awesome food for later!
Earlier I mentioned how well Chewy was adjusting to the new apartment. Well as it turns out, we have a new schedule for his walks and outings. So now, he retaliates by showing his immense affection for us by leaving us presents on the carpet. He likes leaving the gift either in the bathroom or right outside of it. I am hoping that he gets used to the schedule really soon because his gifts of affection have this odor see.....LOL.
Well that I think is enough randomness for today. Until the next adventure!